it's also what you make of it: I make an effort to speak with people I meet on the street, waiting for the bus or with the passenger next to me, waiting in line at the supermarket and particularly with the vendors at the fresh food market. this type of having an informal conversation (with a stranger) has to do with storytelling, an art most western cultures have lost (because we started writing everything down). children I meet, either through work or in my neighbourhood are still approachable too and they looove a good story, even though most seem to have a short attention span because of their activities with/on their phone << big thanks to their parents' fine example! so far so good - no discernable rudeness here, but the questions you raise are definitely relevant. TQ for sharing.
it seems to come naturally (or is it character? upbringing? Chinese birthsign?), while it helps me to stay sane in this weird place we think is our world. TQ for the work you do, much appreciated!
First, being locked up away from others, many of us "forgot" or no longer cared how to behave when around other people. People working from home felt there was nothing wrong with, say, being on a phone conference while dressed in just your jocks.
Secondly, while there was enough supplies to go around many frightened or despicable people felt that there was nothing wrong with, say, driving several hundred miles to empty a small town's supermarket of toilet paper. (The despicable amongst them rejoiced that they could now sell them for a nice profit in the city.) It was not a case of "we are all in this together" but instead "one has to look after oneself first". In that way supplies ran out for some.
Finally, while locked up we imagined a better world - one in which people really cared for one another. We imagined this for so long that we ended up believing that it actually existed (the Golden Age Fallacy.) Once free, we wondered where this world now was.
Also it didn't help that the Covid-19 pandemic put the world health experts between a rock and a hard place. Mistakes were made around the world as everyone scrambled to learn what they could about the virus and how best to handle it.
Something that me and friends have discussed a lot. We're in Bristol (South-West England). Aggressive car drivers, aggressive cyclists, curt behaviour all around. We're all quite twitchy. We had a very different pandemic experience to you in Australia, but most of us (certainly in the liberal democracies) had quite similar restrictions/lockdowns at various points. I think the world is quite angry. Social media is easy to blame and with good reason. How we interact, our patience with one another, life spent staring a screen. Politics too extreme everywhere. Not enough bland, moderate, nuanced politicians.
I had a low opinion of people before 2020... but watching all the brainless progs tripping over themselves to see who could be the most obnoxious mini-Hilter hall monitor made me sick in a way their pet virus never could.
I think the increasing rudeness began before lockdown -- in the US it was the 2016 election campaign when internet nastiness started seeping into real life interactions. The riots in 2020 loosened every tether. And now we exist in this gaga land where everyone justifies their bad behavior with the pretzel logic of bad politics. It’s horrible.
No increase of rudeness here - though to be fair, "here" is Tokyo. I wonder what it's like on the London Underground these days? It was rude enough there already...
I've certainly witnessed an increased rudeness. It's particularly noticable in the reduced amount of time people will allow you to respond before they close conversations, or at least try to finish each other's sentences. I'm in the US, though; here, conversational one-upmanship is a skill quickly acquired.
Undoubtedly. Cell phone addiction is a subject that has been addressed with both speculation and endless memery for years, but ever more often I meet people who seem incapable of committing to a conversation without a technological supplement. I think the changes to the work/study-from-home model that have taken place over the past few years have also played a major role; it seems as if people are becoming used to mingling with one another only via appointment, and anything beyond the times expected for the typical shift, college course, grocery store venture, etc. has been deemed a personal assault against their right to privacy.
I'm wary of using terms like "unprecendented" to describe human behaviors, simply because often the behaviors being described are just new, differently-dressed incarnations of older ones, but I really don't think there's been anything this destructive to the stamina of human attentiveness before. And the consequences are noticeable: many of us are becoming unwilling to interact with others unless it's absolutely necessary.
it's also what you make of it: I make an effort to speak with people I meet on the street, waiting for the bus or with the passenger next to me, waiting in line at the supermarket and particularly with the vendors at the fresh food market. this type of having an informal conversation (with a stranger) has to do with storytelling, an art most western cultures have lost (because we started writing everything down). children I meet, either through work or in my neighbourhood are still approachable too and they looove a good story, even though most seem to have a short attention span because of their activities with/on their phone << big thanks to their parents' fine example! so far so good - no discernable rudeness here, but the questions you raise are definitely relevant. TQ for sharing.
Good on you for trying to keep some sense of civility.
LOL :-))
it seems to come naturally (or is it character? upbringing? Chinese birthsign?), while it helps me to stay sane in this weird place we think is our world. TQ for the work you do, much appreciated!
TQ for reading and commenting!
your substack community is growing :-))
All these people are coming to read your comments!
nah.... your writings are the main course, our comments the indispensable dressing. there's harmony in that ;-))
I have three hypotheses:
First, being locked up away from others, many of us "forgot" or no longer cared how to behave when around other people. People working from home felt there was nothing wrong with, say, being on a phone conference while dressed in just your jocks.
Secondly, while there was enough supplies to go around many frightened or despicable people felt that there was nothing wrong with, say, driving several hundred miles to empty a small town's supermarket of toilet paper. (The despicable amongst them rejoiced that they could now sell them for a nice profit in the city.) It was not a case of "we are all in this together" but instead "one has to look after oneself first". In that way supplies ran out for some.
Finally, while locked up we imagined a better world - one in which people really cared for one another. We imagined this for so long that we ended up believing that it actually existed (the Golden Age Fallacy.) Once free, we wondered where this world now was.
Also it didn't help that the Covid-19 pandemic put the world health experts between a rock and a hard place. Mistakes were made around the world as everyone scrambled to learn what they could about the virus and how best to handle it.
Something that me and friends have discussed a lot. We're in Bristol (South-West England). Aggressive car drivers, aggressive cyclists, curt behaviour all around. We're all quite twitchy. We had a very different pandemic experience to you in Australia, but most of us (certainly in the liberal democracies) had quite similar restrictions/lockdowns at various points. I think the world is quite angry. Social media is easy to blame and with good reason. How we interact, our patience with one another, life spent staring a screen. Politics too extreme everywhere. Not enough bland, moderate, nuanced politicians.
Or did it just reveal their true colors?
I had a low opinion of people before 2020... but watching all the brainless progs tripping over themselves to see who could be the most obnoxious mini-Hilter hall monitor made me sick in a way their pet virus never could.
Don't forget trampling over each other to buy toilet paper!
I think the increasing rudeness began before lockdown -- in the US it was the 2016 election campaign when internet nastiness started seeping into real life interactions. The riots in 2020 loosened every tether. And now we exist in this gaga land where everyone justifies their bad behavior with the pretzel logic of bad politics. It’s horrible.
No increase of rudeness here - though to be fair, "here" is Tokyo. I wonder what it's like on the London Underground these days? It was rude enough there already...
I lived in London for a while and never had a problem on the Tube. Don’t know what it’s like now, though.
Yes. This is how people respond when they are subjected to psychological and biological warfare.
Yikes! Is there hope for us?
Of course.
I've certainly witnessed an increased rudeness. It's particularly noticable in the reduced amount of time people will allow you to respond before they close conversations, or at least try to finish each other's sentences. I'm in the US, though; here, conversational one-upmanship is a skill quickly acquired.
Yeah well I bet Sydneysiders are even ruder!
I’m joking - what a curious thing, though. Do you think it’s related to people becoming used the sorts of instant communications available online?
Undoubtedly. Cell phone addiction is a subject that has been addressed with both speculation and endless memery for years, but ever more often I meet people who seem incapable of committing to a conversation without a technological supplement. I think the changes to the work/study-from-home model that have taken place over the past few years have also played a major role; it seems as if people are becoming used to mingling with one another only via appointment, and anything beyond the times expected for the typical shift, college course, grocery store venture, etc. has been deemed a personal assault against their right to privacy.
I'm wary of using terms like "unprecendented" to describe human behaviors, simply because often the behaviors being described are just new, differently-dressed incarnations of older ones, but I really don't think there's been anything this destructive to the stamina of human attentiveness before. And the consequences are noticeable: many of us are becoming unwilling to interact with others unless it's absolutely necessary.